Stop the search

You showed me that part of myself, I’d been neglecting over the years,

no wonder she was weeping, and the rage, oh the rage

loving you means loving me in my entirety, and who am I without my spite, scarred nose, and smug lips?

Who am I without my anger to push push push?

You showed and probed at the tender flesh and who am I if not overwhelmed by breath?

I don’t know when I will let go of the maybe, I’ve held onto years of my hopes, I can survive on nothing but potential, but you made me face the now, you made me see with my eyes not just the visions buzzing in between them.

Facing you faced me, and the reflection was snarling and oblique, facing me facing you, I find you in everything I do

the way I tidy and pull back my hair, when I hold my hand I imagine it’s yours, I don’t know how to stop the search